The Power of Forgiveness

Last week, Dr. Larry Nassar from Michigan State University (MSU) was sentenced to 40 to 175 years in prison for sexual abuse of more than 150 athletes (including Gabby Douglas and McKayla Maroney, who won gold medal for USA in the Olympics). One of the 150 was one of my mentor’s daughter and listening to her testimony broke my heart. I could not come around to listen to others, since the pain was too much for me to handle.  Many of these girls/women were so broken that they had a tough time forgiving Larry for his crimes and the injustice they faced from all the authorities.

As a man, I don’t think I or many others can fully comprehend the pain and suffering that these women went through or continue to struggle to find solace. All we can do is simply pray for these young women so that they can find hope and healing. Their life is ahead of them and God will bring them healing. Jesus assures us in, Matt 5:4 (ESV) “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”

I am reminded of Jesus on the cross, praying for the people who crucified him, flogged him with a whip having small pieces of metal or bone at the tips, spat on him and left him to die, “…Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."…” (Luke 23:34 NIV). How could Jesus do that?

Recently, the Lord led me through some life challenges, where I realized that forgiving someone who has hurt you, is one of the toughest things to do. It challenges the very core of your being. It forces you to do things that are contrary to what your heart and mind desires. However, I also realized that I needed to forgive those who hurt me, because just like me, they too are broken in their own ways. Sometimes our families, our friends or even someone we trust the most (like Dr. Nassar) can hurt us, because they themselves are broken in their own ways, since they too fail to meet the perfect standards of holiness and love of God like us.  

The act of forgiveness is sometimes like the pealing of an onion. Once you have forgiven the person/s, we can be reminded of that incident, which will bring back pain into our lives and relive the moment. Like pealing of an onion one layer at a time, every time it happens we are to remind ourselves that we have forgiven them and then rebuke the negative thoughts in the name of Jesus. Based on our level of pain, we may have to remind ourselves many times that we have forgiven them, maybe until we begin to believe it or have fully conquered the pain.

Paul tells us in 2 Corinthians 10:5 (ESV) to “ ….take every thought captive to obey Christ,” No matter how many times the painful thoughts come, we have to take it captive every time and bring it under the obedience of Christ. This is only possible, when we recognize that we are the children of God and that we have the authority to cast out every unclean, negative and painful thought, as soon as it comes. Don’t delve on the pain or suffering for too long, otherwise you will slide down a slippery slope of self-pity. The thoughts of the incident will eat you alive and you will become depressed. As someone once said, you can allow a bird to fly over our head, but don’t let it make a nest on your head. Similarly, don’t let the painful, and negative thoughts stay in your mind.

Paul also reminds us in Rom 12:2 (ESV) “… be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” The act of renewing our mind is ours and not God’s. We cannot control the thoughts that come to us, but we can control what stays there. Sometimes even the devil brings back these thoughts, so that he can destroy us and our future. So again, if a thought about the pain and the injustice comes into our mind, we are to immediately take it captive and rebuke it in the name of Jesus, so that we stop thinking about it. One option is to begin worshiping God through thanksgiving or songs. Or we can read the Bible or memorize Bible verses to help us become focused on God and not our thoughts. Over time the intensity of these thoughts will reduce and the pain in our hearts will heal. For some people this can be a quick fix, while for others, especially those who are more emotional in nature, it does take time to heal (me being one too… Lol).

Sometimes, we ask the question, if we forgive those who hurt us, are we not letting them go free? The answer is NO. We ask this question because we do not understand what forgiveness is all about. We forgive those who hurt us, not for THEIR sake, but for OUR sake, so that we can find freedom from our pain and suffering. We forgive to let go of the injustice and hurt on us, recognizing that our God is in control and he will deal with them for their acts.

In Exodus 14:14 (NIV), God is reminding the Israelites that he will fight for us, and is asking them to be still and not fight back. “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.” We also see God’s assurance in Deuteronomy 31:6 (ESV) Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

Just like in the case of Dr. Nassar and all the other authorities who were indirectly involved with this abuse, we just have to trust God that he will deal with them in due time, and we are not to fear them but trust God that he will not leave us ever. Today we are glad, that Dr Nassar has got what is due for him, but hope this would have been exposed earlier.

If you are hurting today, from pain or injustice then let go through an act of forgiveness for your own healing. Don’t fear, speak out boldly to God, like Jesus said, “…Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."